Sunday, July 13, 2008

Learning Spanish is one of the most frustrating things I've ever done

Yeah, what the title said.

It's hard. I don't think I'm terribly good at languages, like some. It's really frustrating, and I always feel like I am wrong. I hate everything about not knowing the language, about using the wrong grammar, about feeling tired because I'm trying to concentrate while I'm nervous. Hard

And honestly, I don't really have to learn the language. The only reason I continue to learn Spanish is because I like it here, and I feel like it is disrespectful that I don't speak their language. I can order things in restaurants, I can get around, I can tell people what I want, I can order food on the telephone (you'd be surprised how hard this can be, seriously), even dating girls with my terrible spanish isn't that hard. Most of the girls I'd be interested in either speak English (it seems like most educated people here at least know some English) or find my bad spanish charming.

Most of the time I want to quit. Too hard. I could be working on my English vocabulary! So hard. So hard. When I speak Spanish, it's just one huge frustration that I can't explain precisely what I want to say. I have to resort to vague, simplistic methods of expression, which is boring. And I think being boring is the biggest sin one can make in conversation.

Example: girl I'm semi-dating and I talk. I have no idea what exactly she understands of what I'm saying. And when I need to be precise with my words, I can't. It's like throwing water at a dartboard. You might hit the target, but most of it hits way off the mark.

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